If only I could touch him…

I was the one who is allergic to anything good;

Be it a job, friends or opportunities;

After pushing everyone away and running about in circles,

I finally admitted that I needed help;

And people gave a lot of recommendations;

And I tried them all;

From yoga to reading motivational books but I still felt myself wanting more.

I almost gave up on the search and resigned myself to being a hopeless case;


Just before I hit rock bottom, someone handed me a tract about the One who saves;

Yeah right, I snorted but later found myself reading out of curiosity;

Intrigued I became, thirsty I grew and more I craved for;

So where do I find Him, I asked myself and my legs took me to a church;

But instead of the warm welcome I anticipated, I was greeted with scornful looks and loud unspoken looks which screamed, “You don’t belong here!”

Shattered by my short-lived hope that I had another chance to become someone;

I had nowhere else to run to and I was out of options;

Why would God even care about me? I thought;

He must have a lot of ‘good’ people waiting on Him to sort out their issues;


But the words on that tract kept reading out loud in my head;

And the scenario played out in my head like watching a movie;

The story of the woman with the issue of blood who touched Jesus;

But instead of some made up face, I saw mine, so desperate, so decided;

Reaching out to touch Him because I needed to so badly.


But where do I find Him in a world that strongly tries to dispute His very existence in the first place?

Among the Pharisees who wish to hoard God away from everyone else?

Or among the ones who wear the tag ‘Christian’ grudgingly?

Who do I turn to?


Are you the one I’m waiting for to point the Way;

To show me His reflection through you;

To lead me to the Light that never goes out?

Will you help me come near enough so I can touch Him?

So I can also be healed of my broken heart and tattered life?

My next-door neighbor, fellow passenger, work colleague, roommate,

Course mate, client, relative and friend;

Whoever and wherever you are; I am counting on you;

Don’t look away when you see me and don’t walk away when we meet;

I need you to tell me who He is; I may appear not to be interested;

But I need to hear it all the same;

Lead me to touch Him too so I can also lead someone else.


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